Last week held some very rough days. So rough that once I almost emailed LT and told him I was ready to ditch this Army thing and go back to being a teacher's wife and work full time myself if I needed to. Inevitably this won't be the only time we face a deployment and though the kids will be older and circumstances probably different, it will still be a deployment - a year of separation.
Here are my things I'm thankful for this week and explanations to follow:
7) The Lord is Faithful. He never lets go. He never gives up. He knows our needs and meets them according to His perfect will.
8) The Lord has called us to this life. When my thoughts of ditch this Army thing (my thoughts weren't that nice, I must confess) came to my mind, I knew in my heart that if we really did ditch the Army, we would be missing out on the blessings and the purpose to which we were called. Though this career isn't the easy road, it's the best road and that's what matters. We're reading through a book called "In A Pit With A Lion on a Snowy Day" By Mark Batterson (great read so far) and he brings out the fact that we always want the Lord to change our circumstances, to lighten our load, but that's not always what brings Him the most glory. Sometimes the most glory is given to God when we're in the pit, when we're fighting for our lives in the world's eyes! For me, it's when things are absolutely chaotic and orderless!
I was giving the boys a bath last night and was looking for the sails to a boat Bailey wanted to play with. As I was looking, God brought to mind an old Steven Curtis Chapman song - Burn the Ships. How like God to remind us at bathtime what He's called us to! The lyrics are below. The gist is that we've gotta let go of the things that seem much easier and pleasant and face what's ahead of us while fully relying on the power of the Risen Christ to get us through each day. He never promised they'd be easy days, but He has promised that He's always with us and gives us all sufficient grace to face whatever is thrown in our paths.
Burn the Ships
Burn the Ships
In the spring of 1519 a Spanish fleet set sail
Cortez told his sailors this mission must not fail
On the eastern shore of Mexico they landed with great dreams
But the hardships of the new world make them restless and weak
Quietly they whispered, "Let's sail back to the life we knew"
But the one who led them there was saying
Burn the ships, we're here to stay
There's no way we could go back
Now that we've come this far by faith
Burn the ships, we've passed the point of no return
Our life is here So let the ships burn
In the spring of new beginnings a searching heart set sail
Looking for a new life and a love that would not fail
On the shores of grace and mercy we landed with great joy
But an enemy was waiting to steal, kill, and destroy
Quietly he whispers, "Go back to the life you know"
But the one who led us here is saying
Nobody said it would be easy
But the one who brought us here
Is never gonna leave us alone
My ships are burned!